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The Levi’s Transit Ballet in Six Movements

 Getting to the Super Bowl will require superhuman endurance.

 

Car
Travel time: At least 2 hours.
Cost: $50 to $80 for stadium parking; the gas you’ll burn in gridlock; your sanity.
Keep in mind: If you must drive, shun 101 and take 280.
Return-trip caveat: Did we mention gridlock?

Fan Express Shuttle
Travel time: 2.5 hours from the North Bay; roughly 2 hours from S.F. and Oakland.
Cost: $55 round-trip.
Keep in mind: Pickup points can make or break you; find yours here.
Return-trip caveat: The last shuttle leaves 45 minutes after the trophy presentation.

Caltrain and VTA Day Pass
Travel time: Under 90 minutes (50 minutes on the Baby Bullet; 20 minutes on VTA, plus a buffer for getting through VTA security). Add 25 minutes if you catch a local Caltrain.
Cost: $40 round-trip.
Keep in mind: Caltrain will run an additional three trains on game day, all of them Baby Bullets. Bonus: you can drink on the train before 9 p.m. Just watch out for the incoming hail of crushed Budweiser cans from the upper deck.
Return-trip caveat: VTA will run up to 2 hours postgame (Caltrain up to 2.5 hours).

BART to VTA
Travel time: Under 90 minutes (50 minutes on BART to Fremont; 30 minutes on VTA’s 251 express bus if traffic is smooth).
Cost: $32.30 round-trip.
Keep in mind: Don’t bet on parking your car at Bart. The lots will probably be at capacity.
Return-trip caveat: VTA will run up to 2 hours postgame. 

Helicopter
Travel time: 1 hour from S.F. (a 20-minute chopper ride between SFO and the San Jose airport, with a limo ride, presumably, on either end).
Cost: $2,300 on a Bell 407 or $2,800 on a Bell 427 for a oneway trip with Private Fly.
Keep in mind: Hopping the bay in a whirlybird doesn’t free you of ground-transport hassles.
Return-trip caveat: You’ll be cursing the gridlock with the rest of us plebes on your way to the airport.

SpaceX Rocket
Travel time: 6.5 hours (5 hours in traffic to the launch site in SoCal, then a 90-minute orbit ending at Levi’s).
Cost: $61 million (one-way).
Keep in mind: Your low-gravitational space odyssey will render your beer bong inoperable.
Return-trip caveat: This isn’t The Martian. Let’s just focus on surviving.

 

Originally published in the February issue of San Francisco

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